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Tempest in a teapot
Mar. 9th, 2007 01:53 pmPeople can be SO annoying.
My friend Darren decided we should throw a St. Patrick's Day party, since March 17 actually fell on a Saturday this year. No problem -- Erik and I thought that sounded like a great idea. Our house is sort of party central anyway -- we tend to host about three or four big parties each year. Darren's sort of using our place as the venue because his own house is a little torn up with some remodeling, plus he's way out in the western San Fernando Valley, and my place is more central. So we're providing the house, and he's taking care of most of the decorations, refreshments, etc. All fine and good.
We invited the usual suspects, but I decided to not invite one couple (R. & K.) because frankly, the husband is a total scumbag lech who actually came on to some girls who were friends of a friend's daughter at a party a while back (they were around 16 at the time). My stepdaughter is going to be with us the weekend of the St. Pat's party, and since she's now fifteen and a half, I just didn't want this guy around her. Also, there was a good chance that some young twenty-something women were going to be coming to the party as well, and since I really didn't want to have to deal with the possible repercussions of having the scumbag in attendance, I just decided it was wiser to not invite him and his wife.
Last week I got a call from one of their friends (J.), who ostensibly called to ask if he could bring any food, but what he really wanted to know was why R. & K. hadn't been invited. I explained, in as diplomatic a way as I could. J. tried to tell me that R. had worked it out with the friends whose daughters buddies had been approached by R. I said that was fine, but since R. had a history of not behaving himself (and believe me, those were not the first girls/women he'd acted like this with...back when we first met he tried to get all friendly and touchy with me, but I turned into the Ice Queen and gave off the vibe that he'd lose a limb if he even tried to touch me, so he backed off pretty fast), I just didn't want him at the party. J. kept trying to force the issue, and I kept stonewalling him, and finally told him that basically the only reason I had ever invited R. and K. to anything was because they were J.'s and his wife's friends. (I actually like K., but I know there's no way to invite her to a party without inviting her disgusting husband as well.) Finally J. gave up, and I figured that was the end of it.
Then Darren e-mails me today and says he's gotten this bogus message from J.'s wife that basically said, oh, gee, we'd planned our own St. Paddy's Day party and even sent out Evites, but no one seemed to have gotten them, and then we got your invitation, so we figured something had gone wrong with our Evite and we'd just go to your party instead. But then some people said they DID get them, so we're going to have to beg off. This is all complete and total bullshit, since we have pretty much the same mutual group of friends, and none of them got this so-called mysterious Evite. No, they're just going to have their own party (although I can't imagine many of their friends are going to come to that party, since they're all coming to mine), just because I called out R. for his obnoxious behavior and put my foot down.
The sad thing is that this is probably going to force people to choose sides, all over a scumbag who really isn't worth it. Loyalty to your friends is fine, but I really don't think you should be defending them when they're lechers and about one step away from being out-and-out pedophiles.
Darren's really pissed off and says he's not going to invite any of them (either R. and K. or J. and his wife) to any of our future parties, so they've really shot themselves in the foot. Oh, well. The four of them can have fun hanging out together, because everyone else is going to be over at my house.
Oh, the DRAMAH.
My friend Darren decided we should throw a St. Patrick's Day party, since March 17 actually fell on a Saturday this year. No problem -- Erik and I thought that sounded like a great idea. Our house is sort of party central anyway -- we tend to host about three or four big parties each year. Darren's sort of using our place as the venue because his own house is a little torn up with some remodeling, plus he's way out in the western San Fernando Valley, and my place is more central. So we're providing the house, and he's taking care of most of the decorations, refreshments, etc. All fine and good.
We invited the usual suspects, but I decided to not invite one couple (R. & K.) because frankly, the husband is a total scumbag lech who actually came on to some girls who were friends of a friend's daughter at a party a while back (they were around 16 at the time). My stepdaughter is going to be with us the weekend of the St. Pat's party, and since she's now fifteen and a half, I just didn't want this guy around her. Also, there was a good chance that some young twenty-something women were going to be coming to the party as well, and since I really didn't want to have to deal with the possible repercussions of having the scumbag in attendance, I just decided it was wiser to not invite him and his wife.
Last week I got a call from one of their friends (J.), who ostensibly called to ask if he could bring any food, but what he really wanted to know was why R. & K. hadn't been invited. I explained, in as diplomatic a way as I could. J. tried to tell me that R. had worked it out with the friends whose daughters buddies had been approached by R. I said that was fine, but since R. had a history of not behaving himself (and believe me, those were not the first girls/women he'd acted like this with...back when we first met he tried to get all friendly and touchy with me, but I turned into the Ice Queen and gave off the vibe that he'd lose a limb if he even tried to touch me, so he backed off pretty fast), I just didn't want him at the party. J. kept trying to force the issue, and I kept stonewalling him, and finally told him that basically the only reason I had ever invited R. and K. to anything was because they were J.'s and his wife's friends. (I actually like K., but I know there's no way to invite her to a party without inviting her disgusting husband as well.) Finally J. gave up, and I figured that was the end of it.
Then Darren e-mails me today and says he's gotten this bogus message from J.'s wife that basically said, oh, gee, we'd planned our own St. Paddy's Day party and even sent out Evites, but no one seemed to have gotten them, and then we got your invitation, so we figured something had gone wrong with our Evite and we'd just go to your party instead. But then some people said they DID get them, so we're going to have to beg off. This is all complete and total bullshit, since we have pretty much the same mutual group of friends, and none of them got this so-called mysterious Evite. No, they're just going to have their own party (although I can't imagine many of their friends are going to come to that party, since they're all coming to mine), just because I called out R. for his obnoxious behavior and put my foot down.
The sad thing is that this is probably going to force people to choose sides, all over a scumbag who really isn't worth it. Loyalty to your friends is fine, but I really don't think you should be defending them when they're lechers and about one step away from being out-and-out pedophiles.
Darren's really pissed off and says he's not going to invite any of them (either R. and K. or J. and his wife) to any of our future parties, so they've really shot themselves in the foot. Oh, well. The four of them can have fun hanging out together, because everyone else is going to be over at my house.
Oh, the DRAMAH.
